Manos: The Hands of Fate



IMDb Rating 1.9 10 34,456


Downloaded times
October 12, 2020


720p.BLU 1080p.BLU
677.99 MB
English 2.0
23.976 fps
70 min
P/S N/A / N/A
1.23 GB
English 2.0
23.976 fps
70 min
P/S N/A / N/A

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by OttoVonB 1 / 10 / 10

Your eyes and ears will BLEED!

Some films are so bad, they're good. Meaning "fun" or "entertaining" or at least "interesting"... But few films can claim to be so dreadful, you actually feel physical pain while viewing them. So bad are these damned few that you don't experience them or watch them: you "endure" them. This is the mother of all such films! "Manos the hands of fate" is without a doubt the most inept and atrociously awful film ever made. Its poorness is so extreme that of itself it is the film's strongest selling point. The script is non-existent, the acting makes Steven Seagal look like a member of the Royal Shakespeare Company and the editing could have been less horrendously botched by a blind Eskimo with no arms. It is also painfully slow. this film makes might barely last 70 minutes but you will feel like you've aged ten years by the end of it. That's what makes a film truly bad: the fact that despite its overbearing weaknesses it isn't even entertaining! Many people look back at the sixties and think, with obvious resentment for today's cinematic output, that "they don't make them like this anymore!". Watching "Manos..." would cure any breed of hardcore nostalgia. In the end I can not advise against this strongly enough. This is for the masochist in you (or the sadist if you insist on showing it to friends). Any other part of your person can only feel pained or offended by such extreme trash!

Reviewed by eoinsmith001 2 / 10 / 10

If nothing else, then at least you'll learn that nothing else could ever be this bad...

I watched Manos last night. Oh, I was the cocky one, intrigued by all the attention Manos receives, even though it is, after all, 40 years old. Sure, I thought, it'll be a laugh to investigate the claim that this might be the worst film ever made. Why, if its that bad, there must at least be comedy value in its awfulness? And in consolation, it is only an hour long. No, the warnings are true and serious, this is bloody terrible. After twenty minutes, I had stopped sniggering at the unimaginable ineptitude. I only realised that twenty minutes had passed when i flicked on the timer on the DVD; I honestly thought it was closer to forty-five. After forty minutes I was shifting uncomfortably in my chair and I wanted to cry. After an hour, I was submerged in despairing, pointless anger. I was angry with everyone involved in the film, angry with my cup of tea, my flat, the world, even God Himself (or Herself). You will lose faith in humanity watching this film. Imagine any conceivable measure for any possible aspect of film-making, and Manos still gets zero out of whatever. This "film" fails so utterly in every way, you'll wonder if anyone involved in its creation had ever seen or even heard of films or television. No, more than that, you'll wonder if they'd ever even spent a day on this planet. There isn't one single moment that you forget that these people are standing in front of a camera, ineptly executing one of the most awful scripts ever imagined. I've never been so insulted by any form of "entertainment". I lost count of the number of times I was beaten over the head with a totally obvious point. I lost count of the number of times completely random stuff just *happened* with no genesis or consequence. I certainly didn't lose count of the number of locations used, or the number of musical cues, you could count those on one hand, after a circular saw accident. It baffled me that they never realised that you can't shoot film at night without some form of lighting. And the music itself... oh God. I don't need to warn you about spoilers, there's plenty to complain about without resorting to inconsequential detail. Like the way that every time it cuts to the family, they're just standing, for no reason, in the same spot, waiting to talk to the camera. Like the absolutely shocking and disgraceful editing. People jump from awake to asleep and back, from one spot to another, from happy to sad, instantaneously. The awful acting... I don't know, its like everyone was given a piece of paper with some emoticons for happy, sad, scared and angry, and told to learn them off. The dialogue... well, technically it *is* dialogue, in the same way that McDonalds is food. Well, some people might enjoy McDonalds. See, I can't think of a parallel awfulness; "Manos" is to "bad" as... you can't finish that sentence. Good Lord, I could go on, and on, and on, but I won't. This film cannot warrant anything but a 1/10 on IMDb. I haven't seen any of the other bottom 100 as of today, but i'm willing to bet that they are at least a rough approximation to what we call a "film". This is not. Seriously, you really, really need to be in a masochistic kinda mood to see this out. I had to leave the screen timer on after 45 minutes just so I could keep reminding myself that, second by second, it *would* end. Because Hell itself might just be never-ending Manos.

Reviewed by mstomaso 2 / 10 / 10

A $300 refrigerator , and I am still waiting for the sequel

Upon release, Manos: The Hands of Fate swept theaters throughout the world, causing mass hysteria, panic, and power outages as theater-owners tried to keep up withe the endless demands for more power to power more projectors and sound equipment. Concerns for the general health of the world's population kept it shelved for several years, but now, finally, the greatest film of all time has been unleashed upon the public. With a score by John Coltrane and Frank Zappa (who also appears as "The Master"), direction by Martin Coppolla (illegitimate son of Mr. Scorses and Francis Ford...), and a script written by Stephen King (at the age of 14), Manos is as legendary as it is brilliant. Not. There really is no sense in beating this poor film into the ground any more than it already has been. What I find sort of amusing is that after a third or fourth viewing (yes, I admit it, I'm a masochist), is that it's sort of grown on me a bit. Like a fungus! Manos is about a small family of yankees who get lost in the southwestern US and end up in a place from which nobody can leave, in an Inn overseen by a twitching human-goat hybrid named Torgo (who steals the show) and owned by the enigmatic "Master" - a worshipper of Manos who collects wives through trapping them at his inn. I guess you can figure the rest of the film out pretty easily. This ends up being a horror film with virtually no horror, an action film with the most poorly shot action sequences I've ever seen, and an artsy jazz vehicle with such poor acoustic sound quality that it would have been much better with just the groovy soundtrack and no dialog. The biggest problem with Manos is what we call "Production values". To cut to the chase, there are none. There is too much wrong with this film to list it all out, so instead I will list what's right with it. The acting is not entirely awful - but the sound, editing, pacing and camera work are so bad that the actors all look totally ridiculous at all times. The script is not the worst I've seen, but it is lost in the jerks and irks of the pace (dramamine recommended), and finally, the plot is no worse than some of the recent Hollywood horror catastrophes I have seen, but it to is swept up in the maelstrom of maleficence emanating from the director's chair. The result would make a great object example for a film production class in "what not to do". Most people will find this film tedious, idiotic, and unwatchable. The average person, I think will turn it off after the first 5 minutes of countryside pans during the opening driving scenes. Some would argue that my rating of 2 is too high. I won't argue that point but I will explain that I reserve "1" for those truly aggravating films which do more harm then good, serve no purpose, and do nothing to expand the boundaries of contemporary film-makers' and cinema-goers imaginations. Most of these are commercial Hollywood romantic and sex comedies and horror films. Manos, at least, occupies an important place in film-making history, and should really be seen by would-be film-makers and participants. At least it didn't cost much to make, and at least it does no real long lasting harm. Can't say the same for, for example, "American Pie". For these reasons, I reserve the rating "1" for such truly harmful films. The distinction is best made through an analogy. If you buy a refrigerator for $3000, and it breaks down immediately upon the expiration of the warranty, that refrigerator has done you some harm. If you buy one for $300, and it does the same, you should count yourself lucky.

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